Flying Monkeys!
by Ozuchi-Kozuchi
Summary: A shopping day with Komui can only lead to one thing. A flying monkey assault on the Black Order!


**A/N**: I live! I live on an air-mattress but I live none the less! Sorry I haven't posted anything in a…_really _long time. My computer is still in the process of moving so I don't have my documents. I did have this on a USB though, so please give some feedback and tell me if I should continue it. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer**: I do not own -man. And sadly, I don't own a flying monkey either…yet.

O_O?

Komui was walking around town, wondering what he should do. The Science Department had told him to get some fresh air after his last experiment/creation/monster went wrong. Truthfully, they'd just wanted him out of the way so they could clean up, but he didn't know that.

So, as our dear Komui walked around, a sign for the Saturday Market caught his eye. Apparently, this was a bazaar of sorts, selling products from around the world. Komui thought about it. Was there really a reason to go? He didn't _need _anything…but then again, this was Komui. He merrily walked towards the bazaar, excited at the prospect of going home with cool…stuff.

O_O?

Lenalee was now officially worried. Her brother hadn't been seen in hours. "Are you sure he went to town Reever?" she asked. The older man nodded, rubbing the back of his head. If Komui wasn't back soon, there would be issues with paperwork that he really didn't want to deal with.

Lenalee frowned. It wasn't Reever's fault, but he should have sent finders with her brother. Who knew the trouble he could get himself into in the 4 hours he'd been unaccounted for. Lenalee readied her self to go look for him, activating her Dark Boots. She prepared to jump off, bending her knees. Mid-jump, Komui burst through the doors. Lenalee stumbled to a stop. "Brother, where were you!"

"I went shopping!" the grinning Scientist exclaimed. He held up his arms, adorned with bulging bags, as proof. God only knew what lie in those bags.

"Lenalee, I'm sorry but we couldn't find him anywhere. He's not here at Headquarters, and Kanda and Lavi checked the surrounding forest. Lavi went the farthest, so he'll be back in a minute. " Allen walked in, looking dejected, followed by the other Exorcists. They stopped when the spotted Komui. Kanda pulled out his Mugen while Allen went into Black mode. "We searched for an hour trying to find you!" Allen screeched, pointing accusingly at Komui.

"Who me?" asked Komui, trying to look innocent. All of a sudden, a small furry face popped up over Komui's shoulder. The gathered Exorcists froze.

Klaud was the first to recover. "That's a monkey, isn't it?" she asked. Lau Jimin squeaked his agreement from his perch on Klaud's shoulder.

"Why yes it is. But not just any monkey! Show them Marian," Komui clapped his hands. The monkey jumped into the air…and started to fly! The Exorcists and Reever stared at it, dumbfounded. Komui laughed.

"Holy Flying Monkey!" shouted Allen.

"I'll have to remember that!" said Lavi, walking in grinning. "I see you found Komui." He hadn't bothered to look up.

"No! I mean, we found Komui, but the monkey, it's flying, and….LOOK UP!" Allen yelled.

The monkey had circled around the room and was now hovering above Lavi's head. As the red-haired Exorcist looked up, the monkey dived. Lavi gave a strangled yell, and did a comical little dance. He grabbed his hammer from the pouch on his leg, but before he could activate it, the monkey swooped in and took it.

"Get that monkey!" yelled Lavi, chasing the flying critter around the room. He kept jumping, trying to reach the monkey, who seemed to be having fun. Allen was rolling on the floor laughing, and even Kanda was doubled over trying not to laugh at the scene before him. Miranda had gone and tried to help him, which only succeeded in making the situation worse as her Innocence was also taken.

"Marian, stop that!" yelled Komui over the roaring laughter. "Give that back. Bad monkey! Cross Marian, stop that!" Komui had marched over to where the monkey now hovered

"Wait a second…is the monkey named after me!" yelled Cross. He gave a glare at Komui, who proceeded to glare back. "That bastard named a _monkey_ after me!" he hissed.

Klaud gave a small laugh. "Though I think the monkey is smarter then you….defiantly better looking," She smiled. Lau Jimin watched the chaos with mild interest.

As the other Exorcists stopped laughing, they became aware of two things. One, Lau Jimin had started to hiss at the other monkey, and two, said other monkey was doing something odd, like it was preparing for something.

Marian the monkey let out an ear-splitting screech. Marie clasped his ears in pain. Miranda gave a small scream and ran back to her fellow Exorcists, closely followed by Lavi.

"What the hell is that thing doing?" yelled Kanda over the monkey's continued screech. He drew his Mugen. As he dashed over to put an end to the monkey, another monkey came in and stole Mugen. Kanda stopped in his tracks, staring disbelievingly at his now empty hands. He looked up with that comical yet useful anime timing to see a swarm (or maybe a flock?) of flying monkeys streaming in the windows.

Kanda had pride. A deep, deep pride that was almost impossible to break. Akuma? He'd take them on with his bare hands. Noah? Probably the same. Hell, he'd even fight the Earl! But when faced with an army of flying monkeys, there is _only _one choice. And that is to turn around and run as if Komui has made some new "remedy" he wants you to try, or if you see Allen's dish mountain start to lean. Therefore, Kanda ran.

Miranda screamed as the monkeys advanced. Led by Marian, the monkeys *cough*of doom*cough* descended! Our heroes (Allen and company, not the monkeys…sadly) pulled out their weaponry and prepared to fight the monkeys.

The only problem is that this is what the monkeys wanted. As the monkey horde descended, all they did was snatch up the Innocence. Seeing as how Allen's was attached, they just took Allen. The same happened when they failed to remove Lenalee's boots. Lenalee was hung upside down in the air. She screamed. Allen yelled and attempted to reach her but the monkeys picked him up by his arms. Lau Jimin, Timothy, and Chaoji were also carried away screeching. Poor Krory was picked up by his teeth, much like a fish and dragged off.

After the initial flurry of monkeys died down, the ruffled remaining Exorcists, Reever, and Komui stood there horrified. "My Lenalee…" choked out Komui.

"What in the hell just happened?" demanded Kanda, eyes blazing.

"Well," Lavi mused, "Komui bought a demonic flying monkey which summoned a horde of flying monkeys to come kidnap our Innocence, thus leaving us defenseless and unable to fight Akuma. I'd say the Earl just executed a major plan."

Kanda glared at him and mourned the loss of his sword. "And what about Lenalee and the Beansprout?"

"We get them back of course!" exclaimed Komui, a maniacal glint in his eye. "They well rue the day they took my Lenalee away!" He turned to his audience. "We don't need the Innocence! We will use Science! Reever, to the lab!"

"I hate you…so, so much" Reever grumbled before turning around and leading the herd to the lab.

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A/N:Please review or favorite or whatever! I want to know if I should continue?


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